If you ask most people what their number one sexual fantasy is, chances are they’ll say a threesome. Very few people in this world have actually turned down the opportunity to have a threesome, but once they get down to business, they might be surprised to find out there are some rules that come with having threesomes. Here, threesome expert and adult film star Joanna Angel explains some of the basic rules of having a threesome.
Rules. If you’ve never had one before, threesomes can be more complicated than you might think. In order to avoid making yourself look like a fool, adult film star Joanna Angel has compiled a set of rules for you to follow so that you’re prepared should the occasion arise.
Sexpert. According to AskAnjali.com, Joanne isn’t just an actress. She’s also a director, writer, and the owner of her own company. Therefore, she’s beyond qualified when it comes to the world of sex, which includes threesomes. She says she and her boyfriend have them on a regular basis, and has learned some important rules alone the way.
Connection. For one, Joanna says you can’t just expect to go out and land yourself a threesome right away. People aren’t going to take it too kindly if you just come up to them insisting on a threesome. You have to know when the connection is there and when it isn’t, and be able to distinguish between the two.
Energy. ”You’ve just got to make sure you’re all on the same page. You can get that from someone’s energy. I think once you start over-talking about it, I think that once you have to talk about it too much, it’s like the moment’s gone. You sort of have to seize the moment,” said Joanne, as reported by AskAnjali.com.
Planning. Once you’ve found that person who’s willing to join you and your partner, you have to decide when and where this is all happening. Joanne says that while some people like to plan things extensively, others prefer to let it happen naturally. At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that all three of you are having fun.
Positions. Another tricky part about threesomes, is figuring out who gets to do what. Talking about it only makes things awkward, so you should avoid being overly stressed about it. Instead, start with one task and then let everyone else join in when they feel comfortable. According to Joanne, as long as someone is getting some sort of pleasure, it should be pretty easy to let things just go with the flow.
Challenge. “Personally I like to sit on a guys face while the other girl is riding him. Mostly because I like to see if the guy can keep his erection while I am suffocating him. Hehe. It’s a fun little challenge,” Joanne tells AskAnjali.com.
Baggage. Finally, Joanne says couples who want to have a threesome should feel confident and totally trustworthy of one another. There’s no place for jealousy in a threesome, so be sure to leave all your baggage at the door. If you feel like you can’t do that, you probably shouldn’t be having a threesome anyways.
Positive. “They have to be so positive that if the threesome goes by and one person has one minute of sex and the other person has 29 minutes of sex, they won’t even stress about it afterwards,” says Joanne, as reported by AskAnjali.com.
Multi-tasking. ”The best threesomes are when the girls have chemistry with each other. Men are not the best at multi-tasking, so don’t get offended if he isn’t paying equal attention to both of you at the same time, the entire time. If he’s f****** her, go ahead and take the initiative to make out with her or sit on her face so she can eat you out. Rather than relying on your bf to take control of the situation, it could be more fun for you and the other girl to kind of use him as a toy for your pleasure,” says Reddit user carnalnyc.
Mutual approval. “It can’t be someone either of us care about or have cared about in any way at all. The other partner has to be approved by both. Also, we feel that kissing is very personal, so the other partner can’t kiss or be kissed by us,” says Reddit user ledzepretrauqon.
Set some boundaries. “It really depends on the people involved. I would recommend discussing and setting boundaries before-hand, after which it’s all fair game! (except the off-limits things you discussed)” says Reddit user PhedreRachelle.
Communicate. “Talk to the other guy, find out what he’s comfortable with. Chances are the lady you’re with might like guy on guy action. I’m not saying you have to bang him or suck his c*ck, but maybe some light kissing would benefit the situation,” says Reddit user weclock.
No emotions. “My only rule with threesomes is that there are no emotional attachments within the three. It gets complicated fast and jealousy pops up all the time when there are people involved with a deep emotional connection to someone else taking part,” says Reddit user ihcary.